I met a woman the other day. I thought I had met her before but I couldn’t remember where. We got chatting about this and that. She asked how I was, I told her. I asked how she was, she told me. We said goodbye and went our separate ways.
I can’t stop thinking about that woman. About the way she carried herself. About the way she looked. She was beautiful. With big brown eyes that exuded a mixture of wisdom and childlike playfulness. That told me she was a bit naughty but with her head secured firmly on her shoulders. There was mischief in those eyes. There was a hunger for trying new things, breaking away from the mold of society, a desire to be different, to break away from the crowd that stood around her. Limited her. A yearning to be unique and authentic in whatever she did. A passion lived within her, to break down barriers, to bring about change, to shout out to the world who she was in her calm and silent manner. To be seen. Acknowledged. Noticed but not in a loud way, rather in a quiet way. Those eyes saw everything that was going on. She took all of me in. She felt me. She saw me. She didn’t say that much but she heard it all. And her smile. Her smile was alight with kindness and genuine warmth. Her smile spoke to me in a way that her words couldn’t express.
I can’t stop thinking about that woman. She was so capable. Her words held such wisdom, I just wanted to hear more. She was powerful beyond anything I’ve encountered before, a lioness in a small petite body. A fire burning through her, I could feel the heat escaping through the pores of her body. She was serious but fun. She was quiet but loud. She was silent but her voice spoke. With her eyes, her smile, her body, her everything. She was broken but whole. She was damaged but fixed. She was nothing but everything.
I can’t stop thinking about that woman. Sometimes, I stand and I look at myself in the mirror and I try to remember when we met. I try to recall where we had met before. I try to remember who she was. What we spoke about, what she said. Did she remember me? I look at myself in the mirror, at my big brown eyes and sometimes I think I see her staring back at me so I turn around to see if she’s there but there’s no one else in the room but me. I look again.
And then, just the other day, when I was trying to remember her again, I stared really hard. And I saw her. I saw her standing right in front of me. And she was staring back at me. With her big brown eyes and her beautiful wide smile. And we looked at each other and we met again. And we spoke. I asked her how she was, she told me. She asked me how I was, I told her. And then, we went our separate ways. But I think I’m going to see her again. I look forward to seeing her again. Today. Tomorrow. Every day.
*This was something I wrote after a 15 minute sprint coaching session with Pamela from PVN Self Compassion Coaching. I was asked to think back to a time when I felt my happiest, my most confident, my most complete self. This is what I wrote.